So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
