chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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