I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Two words: blizzard sex
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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