So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
We were destined to go to rehab together
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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