break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
