you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize