if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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