would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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