She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
