how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
My vagina is very pro this idea
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
