If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize