i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize