I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
should my penis look like a turkey
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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