Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
