Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize