i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think pants incapable of making pants work
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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