Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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