Im at strip club and am horny
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
