Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
