So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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