The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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