sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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