boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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