I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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