i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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