Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Randomize
