this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Randomize
