so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
