I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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