Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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