nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
