somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
His nipple licking is glorious
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