Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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