I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize
