YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I faked an abortion last night.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
you made out with another girl for some wings
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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