I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
