I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable