Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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