You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
The convent might be a nice break from real life
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
