guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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