I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
