Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
