I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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