As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
