If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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