They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize