Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
