Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(914): View more from New York

Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.

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(907): View more from Alaska

i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me

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(641): View more from Iowa

FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER

(1-641): View more from Iowa

STOP listening to that song

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17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Read it at the TFLN blog
(703): View more from Virginia

He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.

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(862): View more from New Jersey

so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?

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(219): View more from Indiana

my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus

(317): View more from Indiana

and who said we didn't have goals?

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(620): View more from Kansas

We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.

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