Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever. http://tfl.nu/us8u
  Replies (26) Good night (902) Bad night (5070)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches http://tfl.nu/f64u
  Replies (19) Good night (4003) Bad night (1148)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  he fucked me so hard my future children felt it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): he fucked me so hard my future children felt it http://tfl.nu/ioph
  Replies (43) Good night (11452) Bad night (951)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well. http://tfl.nu/uja4
  Replies (56) Good night (1102) Bad night (5031)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe http://tfl.nu/ye00
  Replies (35) Good night (1368) Bad night (14052)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time http://tfl.nu/rajz
  Replies (21) Good night (8398) Bad night (938)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex. http://tfl.nu/rq63
  Replies (11) Good night (4168) Bad night (1565)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout http://tfl.nu/u300
  Replies (6) Good night (2604) Bad night (1119)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center. http://tfl.nu/it0q
  Replies (18) Good night (996) Bad night (4461)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup. http://tfl.nu/z0w1
  Replies (7) Good night (3270) Bad night (880)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'. http://tfl.nu/236r
  Replies (22) Good night (3524) Bad night (1091)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations. http://tfl.nu/xedp
  Replies (15) Good night (2446) Bad night (1098)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy. http://tfl.nu/6702
  Replies (12) Good night (716) Bad night (2143)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA" http://tfl.nu/kezs
  Replies (2) Good night (758) Bad night (422)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it. http://tfl.nu/8dj0
  Replies (7) Good night (1059) Bad night (255)

Randomize