Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Randomize
