mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize
