WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
