rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
We don't watch enough power rangers
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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